Pinings — Advice by Sherry Hughes

Stuck In A Sticky Work Situation

Dear Pinings,

I have a major dilemma that is plaguing my small company. One of my coworkers, ďSandyĒ is sleeping with another coworkerís ex-husband. The ex-wife is well aware that there is something going on, but is not yet aware of the level of their relationship. ďSandyĒ is in her early 20ís and the ex-husband is in his early 40ís. The two seem to be doing many things just to spite the ex-wife. The whole situation in having a detrimental effect on the quality of work here. Itís also also creating a hostile workplace. I feel like I am stuck because what do I do if I am approached about the situation? Do I tell the truth or wait till someone else spills the beans?

Thank you for your help!

- Stuck between a rock and a hard place....

Dear Stuck,

Itís always hard to deal with people who donít have any boundaries. Trust me, Iíve known plenty.

Itís really not your place to say anything to the ex-wife, unless you consider her one of your close friends. She might just know more than you think she knows. And youíve heard the phase about shooting the messenger, right? On the other side of the coin, ignorance is bliss. She might know all she wants to know.

If things are getting messy at work, you (as the boss) should feel okay about setting the 20-year-old straight about appropriate behavior at work. And you might just give her some advice about being empathetic and kind ó if you think thatís appropriate too.

Good luck.

Sherry Hughes welcomes letters from readers. Reach her at

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