April 6, 2005

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Pink Spiders, Modern Swinger/Little Razorblade
Geffen Records, 2006

Geffen’s latest squandering of enough scratch to pay off the Nicaraguan national debt comes in the form of Nashville nu-mods Pink Spiders, a hook-starved bunch of Gang of Four-mosquitoes, here caught stealing everything from Jack and Meg’s strict color-scheming (they’re easily imagined getting snippy backstage over whose turn it is to wear the “Good n Plenty trousers”) to Dandy Warhols’ unwittingly corporate sense of hipness to posting a four-eyed Bun E. Carlos guy at the drum set. If this lot would stop force-feeding themselves old post-punk albums they don’t reallylike and leave poor Ric Ocasek to rot in peace rather than tied to a custom-made “I’m the Producer — That’s Why!” director’s chair, there might be a chance they’d trip over a Spoon demo while reaching for the newest kiddie-emo gunk that’s obviously their preference. Until then, they’ll be holding Small Faces poses like little alt-rock yoga masters, overworking their brains in the hope of producing better pick-up lines than “Hey hey little razorblade, girl you’re so, so dangerous.” Don’t leave your nostril-stud in their hotel room in the AM, ladies. D+
— Eric W. Saeger


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