Boomers — How I Saved The World...
How I saved the world (between coffee breaks)...
By Bruce Bressack
As you can see, sometimes I get a little agitated. It doesn't happen often, but when it does "look out"!
Not that I'd hurt a fly mind you, but I have been known to tell them "where to go and how to get there". They usually laugh at me, in that fly sort of way. And, when they do, I simply threaten to cut them out of my will. Shuts 'em up. Works every time!
Alas, on those rare occasions when I do get peeved, it always helps me to remember the words of the famous philosopher, 'Harvey Wallbanger', who once (almost) said, "It's better to bounce off a few walls than to have a few walls bounce off of you".
Now that's philosophy at its best....surreal, yet informative....succinct, yet oblique....mind-altering, yet mind-less...fruitless, yet fruitless.
Hey, did I mention that I saved the world today?
That's right, saved the whole damn world......and it wasn't even on my calendar or my 'To Do" list.
How you say?
Well, I got a call from the President this morning and he was wondering how I felt about transferring Sovereignty back to the Iraqis. I said it was a good thing, since it was, after all, their country.
Then, before I could hang up the phone with the 'Pres', he asked me which country we should invade [I think he meant "free"] next.
I said, "We've probably freed enough people for the time being....why don't we just give peace a chance".
Well, he loved the 'give peace a chance' idea. He'd never heard about this concept before, and asked if he could trademark the phrase.
I said, "I think Lennon owns the copyright, but I don't think he'd mind if you jump aboard the peace train for awhile".
I hung up the phone, confident in the knowledge that George would do the right thing, especially in an election year.
So, without even meaning to, I saved the world (or at least Iran) today.
—Story by Bruce Bressack
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