Pinings: A little recognition please?
by Sherry Hughes firstname.lastname@example.org
A letter came via e-mail last week from a friend who was married last summer. She said she was in the midst of writing thank-you notes and was sorry it was taking so long. She also said if we hadnít gotten a thank-you note in the next month or so, we should let her know. She said she was taking a long time because she wanted to really let all of us know how much she appreciated our friendship and love. She also said that we shouldnít feel hurt if she didnít mention the gift because she really wanted to focus on our support and what we mean to her.
I think this is ridiculous. I never got a thank-you for the shower gift I sent (I live eight hours away) and now, five months after the wedding, I havenít received a thank you for that gift. We went out of our way to take time off from work, drive there and stay in a hotel in order to attend the wedding. I donít expect a medal. But is it too much to expect a thank-you note somewhere in the month or two after the event?
No, it isnít too much to ask. Your friend needs some serious lessons in manners. Somewhere down the line, the doyens of manners, Emily Post or someone, said it was OK to take up to a year to send either a gift or a thank you for a gift, Iím not sure which. Well, that rule stuck in peopleís minds and has become the ultimate way to be a slacker when it comes to a wedding.
Itís a nice thing to send a shower gift if you canít attend the shower, but not necessary. Thank you notes should have arrived much sooner. It was the ultimate in rudeness to ask people to let her know if they hadnít received a thank you note. And to not mention a gift in a thank-you note? Well, I suspect she didnít keep track of who gave them what.
Count your blessings. This is an opportunity for you to learn ó about manners, friendship and expectations.
Sherry Hughes welcomes letters from readers at email@example.com