February 15, 2007


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Pinings: A little recognition please?
by Sherry Hughes sah103@hotmail.com

Dear Pinings,
A letter came via e-mail last week from a friend who was married last summer. She said she was in the midst of writing thank-you notes and was sorry it was taking so long. She also said if we hadnít gotten a thank-you note in the next month or so, we should let her know. She said she was taking a long time because she wanted to really let all of us know how much she appreciated our friendship and love. She also said that we shouldnít feel hurt if she didnít mention the gift because she really wanted to focus on our support and what we mean to her.

I think this is ridiculous. I never got a thank-you for the shower gift I sent (I live eight hours away) and now, five months after the wedding, I havenít received a thank you for that gift. We went out of our way to take time off from work, drive there and stay in a hotel in order to attend the wedding. I donít expect a medal. But is it too much to expect a thank-you note somewhere in the month or two after the event?

Dear Steamed,
No, it isnít too much to ask. Your friend needs some serious lessons in manners. Somewhere down the line, the doyens of manners, Emily Post or someone, said it was OK to take up to a year to send either a gift or a thank you for a gift, Iím not sure which. Well, that rule stuck in peopleís minds and has become the ultimate way to be a slacker when it comes to a wedding.

Itís a nice thing to send a shower gift if you canít attend the shower, but not necessary. Thank you notes should have arrived much sooner. It was the ultimate in rudeness to ask people to let her know if they hadnít received a thank you note. And to not mention a gift in a thank-you note? Well, I suspect she didnít keep track of who gave them what.

Count your blessings. This is an opportunity for you to learn ó about manners, friendship and expectations.

Sherry Hughes welcomes letters from readers at sah103@hotmail.com

2/8/2007 Bad news sister

2/1/2007 Toughen up
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1/11/2007 Trying to get better
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12/14/2006 Nice to meet you
12/7/2006 Survey says!
11/23/2006 Scrooge's night out
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08/24/2006 Act the part
08/17/2006 www.addicted.org
08/10/2006 Cousel-ation prizes
08/03/2006 Bridezillas
07/27/2006 Office space
07/20/2006 Dream a little dream
07/13/2006 Hanging on the telephone
06/29/2006 Lets get it on
06/22/2006 A dubious proposition
06/15/2006 Fighting Fair
06/08/2006 Dogged by guilt
06/01/2006 Itsy bitsy
05/25/2006 Lovey dovey couple
05/18/2006 Simple questions
05/11/2006 My racist friend
05/04/2006 Secret nostalgia
04/27/2006 Making connections
04/20/2006 Live a little
04/13/2006 Live a little
04/06/2006 Torn
03/30/2006 Disagreements
03/23/2006 The simple life
03/16/2006 I thought it was love
03/09/2006 Alone but not lonely
03/02/2006 Compatability?
02/23/2006 A rock and a hard place
02/16/2006 A whole-hearted agreement
02/09/2006 Growing apart
01/26/2006 Tuning out?
01/12/2006 Under pressure
01/05/2006 Sex isn't everything?
A Few Words From Sherry

A LIttle Joy, A Little Heartbreak
Abusive Relationship
Abusive Relationships
Advice to young mother
Annual Tips For Avoiding The Holiday Fight
Any Way To Return To 'Just Friends'?
At The Women's Expo

Back In The Same Place
Back Off, Buddy
Bad Breaks
Being Patient
Blog, Blog, Blog
Broke up

California Dreaming
Changing My Mind
Clearing It Up
Cooking Help
Confused and Angry
Consumed By The Internet
Crying All The Time
Dating Again
Falling Short
Family Friction
Friend, With Benefits
Friendly Secret
Gift-Giving Season
Go to Funeral?
Hunting Season
In Love and Confused
It's the most "beautiful" time of the year...
Keeping Things Secret
Just Sex
Lying, But Not Cheating
Might Get Married
Move Back Home?
My Boyfriend's Computer
My Roommate's Family
Mutual Intrigue
Needs Support
Newly Single Mother
No Explanation
Nosy Neighbors
Nothing Happened
Oh, Grow Up

On Her Way To 'Trouble'

Our Pal Al
Pretty Tight
Publicity Stunt?
Quiet, Please
RSVP, Please
Ruthie's Secret
Should I Stick or Should I Run
Should I Tell Him
Shy Girl
Splitting and Sharing
Stuck In A Sticky Situation
Sucky Gifts
Taking advantage
The Boyfriend & The Friend
The Difficult Coworker
The Letter
The Pain In Spain
The Sad Bride
The Ultimatum
Two Men At The Same Time
Vacation, Not

Why would anyone stay?