Hippo Manchester
January 5, 2006

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Publisher's Note: HIppo Manchester — Five years later
by Jody Reese

Five years ago, Hippo started publishing out of a tiny Elm Street office above The Black Brimmer.

This is our 261st issue and marks our fifth anniversary. A lot has happened at the paper and in the city since then. However, the idea behind the paper has never changed: to show that Manchester is (or can be) a fascinating place to live, work and play.

In keeping with that, here are my 2006 predictions.

1. Brady Sullivan will buy City Hall Plaza and rename it Brady Sullivan Plaza.

2. Mayor Robert Baines will take a job in Governor Lynch’s administration as a department head or some type of commissioner, but agree to stay only two years to keep his options open to run for mayor in 2007.

3. Mayor Frank Guinta will move out of his family’s condo in Ward 3 into a single-family home in Ward 1, just down the street from former mayor Ray Wieczorek.

4. The ultra-hard-rock band Slip Knot will return to the city for an open-air show at Fisher Cats Stadium. The resulting fury will encourage new owner Art Solomon to sell his share in the baseball team to Playboy Enterprises, which will rename the stadium Playmate Stadium. Attendance goes up.

5. After being bounced from WTPL-FM, radio and TV show host Arnie Arnesen will end up on Nashua’s AM station WSMN, working alongside Woody Woodland. WKBR will switch from all oldies to sports. WGIR-FM will switch to an all-oldies format and WMLL-FM will go to an active rock format. All in all, music will not change much in the Queen City.

6. Keith Hirschmann and Joe Kelley Levasseur will continue their losing streak and lose their races for House seats. However, the pair will become partners in an Elm Street bar called the Glass House. It will be a huge success.

7. A drought will hit the area and lower the level of the Merrimack River so much so that it will begin to smell like raw sewage. Condo sales along the river, from Manchester to Lawrence, won’t do so well. PSNH will finally be convinced to release more water from the Amoskeag dam after yuppies picket its new headquarters on Commercial Street.

8. Dean Kamen will finally give up on the Segway, succumbing to the realization that the bicycle is by far a more healthy and less expensive option for police, postmen, short-trippers and everyone in the Third World. However, his yet-to-be-invented hydrogen engine will make the Segway look like a toy for rich geeks.

9. The Liquor Commission will shut down troubled club Omega. A new club called Alpha will open in its place.

10. Hippo publisher Jody Reese will take up golf in an attempt to shed the 30 pounds he’s gained since starting the paper, and begin writing about golf in every publisher’s note, hoping one day to be able to match that older (and thinner) fellow on William Loeb Drive, who seems to love chasing that little white ball.

Bonus prediction: Cher will return to Manch for one more farewell.